That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
