i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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