yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
