I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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