I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
