My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
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