Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
im six kinds of drunk right now
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Randomize
