Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
