is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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