i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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