nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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