just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
