vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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