You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
oh god was she eating orange peels again
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
