I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
