If that was your dad, he is hot
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize