That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Randomize
