Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
