Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
