i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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