How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
