so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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