Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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