Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize