I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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