So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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