Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
