it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
