im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
