Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Randomize
