Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
