I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
