Grow some girl-balls and come out already
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just want nice things and good sex
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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