SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
