is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize
