i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Randomize
