Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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