I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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