we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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