her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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