I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Randomize
