oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Randomize
