Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
