Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize