he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
