Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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