Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
