God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize