I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
