Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
