piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
